Sarah & Ian Hoffman

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Participate in a Study on Gender-Nonconforming Kids

March 1, 2012 by Sarah

I was contacted recently by Riley Graham, a graduate student in the School of Education at Mills College in Oakland, CA, about her study: The Young Child’s Independence in Expressing Gender Nonconformity.

Riley is looking for parents or legal guardians of gender-nonconforming children between the ages two and eight to participate in the study, which is about how young gender-nonconforming or gender-questioning children express their gender identity in preschool. She said: “Your assistance in this study is very important, and may contribute to making preschool a more welcoming and inclusive place for young gender nonconforming children.”

The study will look at:

How the preschool environment might affect young gender nonconforming children’s ability to express their gender identity

How the preschool teacher might affect young gender nonconforming children’s ability to express their gender identity

What the connection between parent or legal guardian involvement in supportive services, e.g. therapy, listserv and their positive reports of support in preschool and by the teachers might be

I think that participating in this study is a great opportunity for caretakers to speak about their experiences, and potentially to make a difference as we show the benefits of family support for kids who are different.

Click here to complete the anonymous online survey. (It should take 10-30 minutes to complete; upon completion of survey, you will be entered into a raffle for a $100 amazon.com gift certificate.)

Questions? contact Riley Graham at rgraham@mills.edu.

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Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: "gender variant" "gender nonconforming" "gender spectrum" "parenting", "sarah hoffman", bullying, pink boy, riley graham

Good News and Gratitude

February 29, 2012 by Sarah

Do you ever get the sense that things are moving?

In the last month, our school brought in trainers from Our Family Coalition, the LGBT advocacy and education organization. They also sent eight—eight—faculty and staff members to a 2 1/2 day training with Keshet, the organization working toward LGBT inclusion in Jewish life.

The school is honoring the commitments that they made last year. We are so, so grateful. And eager to see what happens next.

In other good news, I’ve finally added a book list to my website. I frequently get requests from readers about books—for themselves, for their kids, for their doctors and family members and schools. Over time I’ve compiled a list of affirming books that I think are helpful, stimulating, and often beautiful. The list is roughly organized according to age of audience—board books (age 1-3), picture books (age 3-8), chapter books (8-12), middle grade books (ages 11-14), young adult books (high school), and adult books.

As I write and speak publicly about issues of gender, I am aware that my topic can also be a metaphor for all the ways kids can be different. And so I’ve included books that address not only gender identity and LGBT families, but sensory processing disorder, race, diversity and nonconformists of all sorts, and, of course—and sadly—bullying. Whether or not any particular issue applies to a particular child, books about difference of any kind can be helpful for understanding and accepting all difference. This is why it’s so important that we not only read a broad range of these types of books to our own children, but that we introduce these books into our schools, libraries, doctors’ waiting rooms, local bookstores, and anywhere else we can think of to share them with the wider world.

Take a look at the list and see what you think of these books. If you have a book to recommend for my list, let me know! If I like it, I’ll add it to the list. 

In gratitude,

Sarah

 

 

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Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: "gender variant" "gender nonconforming" "gender spectrum" "parenting", "sarah hoffman", "transgender", book list, bullying, LGBT, pink boy

Transgender Day of Remembrance

November 19, 2011 by Sarah

November 20 is the international Transgender Day of Remembrance, when we take a moment to honor the lives and mourn the deaths of transgender victims of hate crimes.

Last night I attended Shabbat services at Congregation Sha’ar Zahav, San Francisco’s LGBT synagogue. I heard a prayer that was so beautiful that I wanted to share it with you here:

As the sun sinks and the colors of the day turn, we offer a blessing for the twilight, for twilight is neither day nor night, but in-between. We are all twilight people. We can never be fully labeled or defined. We are many identities and loves, many genders and none. We are in between roles, at the intersection of histories, or between place and place. We are crosscrossed paths of memory and destination, streaks of light swirled together. We are neither day nor night. We are both, neither, and all.

May the sacred in-between of this evening suspend our certainties, soften our judgments, and widen our vision. May this in-between light illuminate our way to the God who transcends all categories and definitions. May the in-between people who have come to pray be lifted up into this twilight. We cannot always define; we can always say a blessing. Blessed are You, God of all, who brings on the twilight.

We cannot always define; we can always say a blessing.

There are many gatherings in honor of Transgender Day of Remembrance going on around the country—click here to find one near you.

 

 

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Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: "sarah hoffman", "transgender", bullying, congregation sha'ar zahav, hate crime, LGBT, parenting, transgender day of remembrance

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Jacob's Missing Book

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Testimonials

“Sarah and Ian were so thoughtful in providing just-right content for our kindergarteners all the way up to our older students. Their loving and honest stories, easy back-and-forth with one another, and humorous delivery of a delicate topic made this sensitive, yet oh-so-critical topic digestible and relatable. This is a conversation that I hope students, teachers, and parents will continue to have with more ease thanks to the Hoffmans. I’m so grateful to them for sharing their gift of their family’s journey, and their beautiful storytelling, with our entire school community.”

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